It's this time again. Even though I only posted my goals on Wednesday I am going to be away for the weekend (I am going to Manchester to a wedding tomorrow Saturday and to a play where a friend is acting on Sunday) so I thought to post my check-in tonight.
This week I have been on annual leave. Yes, I am an academic but my department seems to operate a strange holiday pattern and I am still expected to appear in the office (which I share with 8 more people) every day 9 to 5. Not very writer-friendly, I know. Anyway, this week I have also been all over the place. After a few days with family, which were fantastic and so much fun, I suddenly found myself on Wednesday without one single word written down and a sort of mist sweeping my brain of all sort of order and reason. Then I started feeling the 'back-to-school-panic' and even without thinking much about it I found myself on the unstoppable roller coaster of the new academic year. Aaaaaaaaaarg! Since 2008-09 has been, creatively speaking, a completely disaster year (successful otherwise, I suppose) I feel only now I'm starting to wake up that artist that once was me. And I am running out of time. My awakening is sloooooow, very slow and I find that I put so many other things before my writing. The 'real' things. 'What really matters.' There must be a reason why I'm finding difficult to establish a consistent writing routine and I'm going to find it and slay this reason and any other monster. Maybe deep down I don't believe I can ever be a writer. Maybe I think that is something that happens to others, in the books, in the films, in the dreams. That I should be realistic. But there is this voice inside shouting something really simple: A writer writes. Just do it, do it, go and do it. Write, write! I don't really need to think whether is right or wrong, whether I should or I shouldn't, whether it will be or it won't. Why am I scared? This morning I didn't feel scared, really. I was annoyed. Annoyed at myself. So I sat down in front of my laptop and forgot about everything else: the house needed tiding up, the dishes are unwashed, the laundry is still in the basket, my bag for tomorrow still unpacked... I have done nothing else but write and this is what I've achieved: 5.134 words. The picture above is a snap of the true story in which my current writing is based on. My short story is called Shooting. I have edited it one million times and I still found there was something missing. Today I've figured it out. The journey. My main character's journey was vague and he seemed to stumble between situations without actually living them, without connecting with the rest of his life. My main character didn't seem to have a purpose. I have been rewriting the story today (only paused to read and comment on your blogs :) ) and it's happening. I am not sure if any of you have gone through a creative writing "training". Although it changed the way a write (and read) completely and it helped me to develop as a writer, I find sometimes difficult to step out of the 'rules', the technicalities, the 'right' and 'wrong' of nowadays current writing patterns. Technique is important but SO IS PASSION. And maybe that is something I was loosing. Something today I feel I've grabbed again and I'm not planning to let go. I can't wait to carry on writing my story. I think I'll bring my laptop to Manchester this weekend.
Other writing: Very very behind.
- I haven't even finished The Artist's Way tasks. I will try to get them done over the weekend or otherwise I suppose I can extend the deadline one more week... I have written MPs, though.
- Blogging: I wrote two posts in Ones. The last one was an analysis and thoughts on my last week's reading ban. An amazing SURPRISE. While I thought nobody was following my Writing in Spanish blog, it seems like a few bloggers have been inspired by the writing activities I've posted and have written very good pieces in their own blogs after my suggestions. That made me really happy. And motivated me to carry on posting, which I have done again: a writing exercise based on Morning Pages!
- Yoga: Everyday, twice. Read my Dru Yoga book.
Have a lovely weekend